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Messages - ocean

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Custody Issues / Re: GAL, legal complaint, DV issue
« on: Jun 04, 2019, 05:17:10 PM »
We went through this. Suggestion: File to have counseling court ordered for you and child. Find a therapist near you that is willing to take this on. Go see them first. Then file in court naming this therapist so that you can child can start to form relationship. Child needs outsider to help you without mom being there. Keep up with any visits you are allowed and just make a relationship for the two of you and not bring up mom. If child does, just answer honestly and move on. We fought the good fight and lost as mom PAS the kids to death. As child gets older and if you are still there, hopefully they will start to see mom true colors. If their is another incident with the school, ask them to get CPS involved.Sounds like the child may need counseling other than the relationship for you so maybe the counselor can use some time to deal with school/other issues too. Good luck!

Custody Issues / Re: Ugly Custody Battle
« on: Mar 29, 2019, 03:28:43 PM »
Try not to stress over all of this....just keep texting or emailed offering times to see son. Then your lawyer can use the texts or emails to show you tried to get dad to come for a few visits to meet son again. No response to any craziness is necessary. Just ignore and keep as evidence. Let all phone calls go to voicemail where he can leave a message. What did the principal say?

Custody Issues / Re: Ugly Custody Battle
« on: Mar 28, 2019, 05:30:59 PM »
When is your next court date? Until court, keep offering to meet at a public place for a few hours each week (library, food place) so child can get use to him again with you there. Who is driving him to the school? Are they going inside? His lawyer is telling him ways to see child without you. What is the school policy on coming into school? Ask to talk to the principal about what they will/will not allow. Here a parent can not just walk in and have lunch, they can sign child out only or come in if invited by teacher. Who does dad live with? Does he have a bed/room for child to be there overnight?  Split custody probably will not be given anytime soon since he does not live in school district and can not drive to and from school. Is there any schedule now in place?

Custody Issues / Re: Ugly Custody Battle
« on: Mar 28, 2019, 04:43:20 PM »
If the father is on the birth certificate he has laws the protect his rights as a father and he is protected to get school records, change school records to include him, and unless you have a court order with his days he would be allowed to sign child out of school. Many fathers use the school to have access to child when in a custody battle as the other parent is not allowing access. Do you have an court ordered visitation order now? If so, give it to the school and child will only be release if it gives end of school day on certain days to dad. If not, then file temporary custody and visitation as dad is showing up to school after 2 years of child not seeing him. Keep it about child. What brought this on for dad to file? If dad is serious, then maybe do a step up schedule where he sees child a few hours each week, then 1 over night , then every other weekend....Good luck!

Moms Without Custody / Re: Hurt Strong Falsely Accused Mother
« on: Mar 20, 2019, 03:47:31 PM »
You can go down to family court and ask to see if you qualify for a free lawyer (legal aid) to help you through family court. You would probably need to petition the court next to have unsupervised visits next and see if they grant that. Then after a while you can ask for more time and overnight visits. If the kids are old enough to be in school, get involved , go to school activities, ask to read in child's classroom, go on school trips. If the kids are involved in outside activities go watch them at dance class, base ball practice....You should be allowed in all public places to watch your child as long as it is not against a court order. Let us know if you qualify for legal aid. Bring your court documents with you and a one page history in order of what happened so they can catch up on the case. Good luck! (We are not lawyers, just people who have been through family courts for a very long time)

Moms Without Custody / Re: Hurt Strong Falsely Accused Mother
« on: Mar 19, 2019, 03:18:24 PM »
Where are babies #1 and #2 now? Have your rights been taken away through court? Do you have visitation with them at all? Is this a Child Protective case still?
Depends on what is going on but you need to jump through CPS hoops to get your children back. Call your child worker or their boss and ask what needs to be done next for you to start seeing your children and gaining custody back. What state are you in?

Father's Issues / Re: Legal shared custody being asked to change
« on: Feb 16, 2019, 12:58:04 PM »
Why is this an issue now? How old is child? About picking schools?

Custody Issues / Re: Is this a Material Change is Circumstance?
« on: Feb 15, 2019, 09:50:24 AM »
Def go see a lawyer near you , you can even pull that mom is trying to child support shop to a state that is to 21. You may have a change to get it dismissed in NY. Do you have a court date in NY? What county?
Like you said this will def be dragged out passed May but usually orders go by date of filing. Will son even graduate on time with her if he was failing by you? Call the new school and get on parent portal if they have it and can track attendance/grades.

Custody Issues / Re: Is this a Material Change is Circumstance?
« on: Feb 14, 2019, 01:14:59 PM »
What is your state say about child support ages? NY is to 21 so he mom could ask for child support for him (but you have the other child so....depending on salaries can negate child support). If you are in state that is 18, I agree with you , try to dismiss the case as son is now emancipated due to his age (but some states say 18 or graduate high school). Is he is school at mom's?  The 13 year old is in school and adjusted so as long as 13 doesn't start asking to go live with mom it should be fine. Around 13 is when judges MAY ask for their opinion. Does 13 yr old want to go with mom?

How long has she been in NY? Go see a lawyer in your state and see if you can bring the divorce back to you. What county in NY is this case?

NY child support is to 21. NY you need grounds for divorce. Due to the boys ages and she sent them back to you willingly the courts here will prob not make the boys come back to NY. But there will be visitation and should be visitation when all the kids are together too so they get to see each other. Has she allowed you to see younger two since she left?

Best and first shot is to dismiss case in NY and move it to you. If it stays in NY, post again I am not a lawyer but have many years dealing with NY family court.

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