Messages

This will consume your life because you do care and you want what is best for this child which means you know that this child should have a relationship with the Father well let me say this  in  my state the Judges doesnot like to go againist the mother BECAUSE the judge doesnot want the mother to get the womens groups involed .These women groups will go to court,they will hire a mother a lawyer  they will do what it takes for the mother to get her way all the mother has to do is claim ABUSE , HARRESMENT , STALKING on  and on . The mothers doesnot have to prove nothing to these womens group. Here it is these womens groups gets alot of donations (MONEY MONEY MONEY) and alot of it well they have to show how they are helping these poor abused mothers how they are spending the money and why they need more money. It would suprise you who is donating all this money all I can say is if you want to do something find out the company names that is donating it is strange these companies doesnot want proof either they want there  tax break and the glory that they donate to a great cause HAW-HAW. In this world we live in today it is all about the MONEY and POWER. I say this give yourself a break from this as a man and i am not speaking for all men but i to have a problem with my childs mother will I am ashamed to say but i left it up to my wife now to do the worrying ,research,paper work,phone calls and what ever elese needed to be done to try to resolve this matter finally my wife got tired of my absents in not having any input she also said" AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT CARES ? Tell you what when you turn off the TV and you start listening to me and you get involed in this matter and i know for sure you care I AM DONE I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS OR I DONOT WANT YOU TO ASK ME ANY QUESTIONS. Until you prove yourself to me I am done what ever happens -HAPPENS.I love my wife with all my heart and she is a very caring wife,mother and she beleives what effects me effects her and i feel the same way . NOW the TV goes off and I listen to her and i am made a commitment to help myself and i have proved that to her.I must say that we are much happier  This is not a perfect world and never will but at least it needs to be equal for all . Sorry this post was long but need to be expressed. TURN THE TV OFF AND LISTEN . Take a break  . THANKS  ,  LOST CHILD

It seems to me that if you got a child and your EX has a child then it should be a wash. But if you think that you need to help with your other child thats not living with you then that is your call.

Thank-You I am glad you are not going no where!!!!!!!!!!! We all need each other . Look at my post it is called "mother wants child support but not the child give me your input .Also you can vote  on this problem . I can wait till I can post IT IS OVER. For now it seems to be just a dream that it could ever be over. Enjoy your car and i highly agree with you it has not sunk in yet that she will no longer be getting child support and oh she needs to hire someone to fix her crap in her house or move in a appartment they have maintance there if anything breaks. If she can't run with the big dogs then she needs to stay on the porch

Got in touch with special child support unit I let the case worker know that the mother doesnot have my child the only thing I can do at this point is fill out paper work that is being mailed to me to lower my CS because I am unemployed . My girlfriend has got 2 money orders 50.00 each for my CS I really feel bad that she is taking her money this is not her problem at the same time she made me feel like a mililon dollars she said look "What effects you effects me and that is the way it is" This LADY is special I love her so much.We are holding on to the money orders for right now . I will be sending a register letter to CS in hopes i can change the payments instead mother getting the money the grandmother will be getting the money for my child.I sure don't want my childs money to go to mother to buy drugs.

That's great happy for you !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please don't leave the forum we all need to stay in touch. Maybe you could give advise or help one of us out you never know. Have fun with the extra money. I would like to know how bad the EX took it that there was going to be NO MORE CS MONEY.ANOTHER one bits the dust!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My best advise to you is prove yourself by that sign up for Parenting classes It looks good in court and you learn alot on how children think and it teaches you how to deal with issues with your child. I went on the advise of a friend it Parenting classes was great and i learned alot . The courts can order that 1 or both parents attend parenting class . In my state if you go on your own it is free if you are court ordered it will cost you all states are different. Parenting classes is like 8 weeks and 1 day a week and most centers have different times to choose from because parents have to work. You will meet alot of people with different problems and you will meet some with the same kind of issues.It is always good not to feel alone it gives you the time to meet people and ask ? and if you don't ask you will never know.Speak to the teacher in charge of the class and ask if there is a anger mangement class that you can enroll in i don't know much about these classes but i know that it can get costly but you might be able to get a great deal if you go on your own this is not saying that you have anger issues are need parenting but if she is saying you got these issues she will press on and the court will order you to go to classes. you better off keeping this to yourself if you go to the classes this way if she ask the court to order you to go then you will have one on her that is always a good thing. Loose lips sink ships its better NO ONE KNOWS !!!!!!!!!!!!! you get more from the classes if you do this without being ordered. You can tell the people that is court ordered and the ones thats not court ordered . Thats all i got hope you follow through for your childs sake and yours.

REMEMBER you got a ways to go with this Mother call her bluff you need to STOP this NOW it will only get WORSE if you don't handle it now . And if she takes you to court youtake your proof that you have been paying extra . NEVER NEVER give her cash  give her a check or money order and spend time writing what this money is for and if she sends you E-Mails PRINT them out what ever you can carry to court with you and the more you got the better off you are . I would strongly suggest you getting a callender and noting everything this will save you .Judges likes calenders the worse thing anyone can do is go to court and your Ex's lawyer or Judge or your own lawyer ask you " Well what date or month or year did this happen (what ever the ?)And you say well I think it was XXX and XXX year they don't want to hear that they want clear facts and dates .Here is my point you need to win the first time she takes you to court because she will not be willing in the future taking you back to court. This will make your childs life better and yours anytime you have to go to court it always in some way affect your child. Children are very smart and they hear what is going on and it makes the child feel bad and then they blame themself for Dad having to go to court . And if she breaks court order DON'T dismiss that push it and make the court enforce contempt on her trust me the court is very quick to enforce court order on Fathers and find in contempt. Let her know that through your actions THREATENING you is not the way to go. Always stay level headed when sending her E-Mails she also has a print button to.Never give her the chance to bring somthing to court that will reflect neg. on you .I always have heared this "IF YOU GIVE EXTRA ROPE THEY WILL HANG THEMSELFS" .I wish you the best let me know how it is going.

In most states the law is 18 years old or if the child is still in school and ETC Why do we have to remind CS of the law. I really thought that the law is the law.It is very smart that you are starting early on this CS is never in a hurry to help when it comes to Father's request. I have heard of past cases it taking a year to stop CS   If it would become law that BM or CS unit had to refund that money back things would work alot faster. I would really like to see CHILD SUPPORT UNIT have to come out of there pocket and pay back overage plus intrest and Lawyer fees if any. Can you imagine how fast CS UNIT would work and enforce the laws they set. This has to get better and one day it may. We have just have to keep fighting no matter how tired we get of the system. Just remember this "CLOSED MOUTH DON'T GET FEED". I agree she is not going to do the right thing by agreeing to this who wants to give up $450.00 a month . THE LAW IS THE LAW. NO matter who doesnot agree.

I have made several phone calls to CS i keep getting voicew mail i am leaving messages but no one is calling me back i will be getting phone records to prove this - NOW it is time to write a leeter and send it register mail. Tigger Thank-You for for advise.I hope this works for me. But the good news is i talk to child enforcement and i am getting form in the mail to fill out to reduce my CS.CS went back 5 years on me because BM wanted to file CS on me I will be drawing SS and not sure if i will live to see this paid off. Winning a LOTTERY right now would help.I would go in person and pay every penny. I could get a good night rest.

Tigger you are right ! I want my child and her grandmother to get cs that i am paying. Most grand-parents that is raising there grandchildren are on fixed incomes and this information came from AARP.The last thing I want is my child doing without and her grandmother having to worry about how things are going to get paid. My childs mother sure not worried about them (child & grandmother)and never will. I just wish that the grandmother would help me and quit protecting her grown daughter. I would like to see my daughter but i guess the grandmother is scared that i am going to try and get custody. I know my child is safe and in a loving home and that is what counts. Thanks Tigger for your support!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!