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#31
Visitation Issues / Re: how do you learn to deal w...
Last post by ocean - Oct 20, 2020, 03:06:54 PMWhat does the NCP say when you ask if he is coming to get child lately? Maybe offer once a month schedule? First Saturday of each month....can he commit to that? Really have to find out the reasons, back to work? Do not tell child he will be coming each visit so his hopes are not up that he will show up. Tell NCP that if he needs to cancel any visit , you need xx hours unless emergency so you are not talking up the vist, only for him not to show.
#32
Visitation Issues / how do you learn to deal with ...
Last post by balleros - Oct 18, 2020, 01:12:33 PMMy son is 9 and his biological father was 100% absent until he was 8. Then with Covid 19, he started to see him on frequent basis. he was seeing him weekly which is what our visitation agreement say. From March to September, they had started to connect.There was a dead in his family at the end of September and that's when his father stopped visits and contact. I respected his need for space at the beginning. Then I started to get pissed. Anyway, besides therapy, has anyone found a solution to not caring about inconsistent visits?
I mean this is not good for my son but I am in two minds between closing the door and allowing these inconsitencies
tips? ideas?
thanks
I mean this is not good for my son but I am in two minds between closing the door and allowing these inconsitencies
tips? ideas?
thanks
#33
Virginia State Forum / Being punished for being menta...
Last post by babydiamond1 - Sep 27, 2020, 06:15:28 PMI am new to VA from NJ. I have been driving over 350 miles each way for the past 3 years on supervised visits because I was hospitalized 3 times within that timeframe. I have never abused nor neglected my children but my sister now claims that she is afraid of me so the children can't come to my apt in VA. I have never done anything to her since we had an altercation that she started 4 years ago and reported it as domestic violence in order to relocate my children 1 year after the event. She dropped the restraining order after she was awarded the relocation but I am wondering now will I ever get unsupervised parenting time especially since I was just hospitalized in late July- August 10, 2020.
#34
Father's Issues / Baby nail clippers
Last post by kimimiles - Sep 25, 2020, 11:45:41 AMLooking for advice on how to use baby nail clippers?
#35
Dear Socrateaser / Re: Can Reunification Therapy ...
Last post by Waylon - Sep 21, 2020, 02:30:25 PMQuote from: maybenut on Sep 19, 2020, 08:37:40 AMThat's essentially it- you can't stop her behavior (usually) but you can offset it with therapy and positive reinforcement. PA is bad stuff, though.
I brought this issue to the GAL and she told me that I need reunification therapy and she gave me a list of reunification therapists in my area (WA). I spoke with a couple of them and they say that they can't stop my ex from alienating. They said they will be able to help me to have a relationship with my kids only by therapeutic support to me and my ex.
I'd definitely recommend the book "Divorce Poison" by Dr. Richard Warshak, which has a lot of good info on Parental Alienation.
#36
Dear Socrateaser / Can Reunification Therapy help...
Last post by maybenut - Sep 19, 2020, 08:37:40 AMI have two kids 2 and 3. After 2 years of not being able to see my boys at all, I was finally able to start seeing them after GAL got involved. Last few visits, my 3 year old has said some pretty disturbing things to me during supervised visits such as:
"Don't touch me!" While saying this he clinched his little fists and said it with conviction.
"I'm just going to play by myself." He said this at the beginning of a visit, as soon as he saw me.
"You're a bad man! I will kill you!"
While eating breakfast, in the beginning of a visit, he said to his mom: "I'm going to get to work, and we'll keep pressure."
"No need to touch me" You're bad" "You hurt my mommy!"
"You're not my dad, my grandpa is my dad."
"It's possible to only love mommy!" after I told him that I'm his dad.
I brought this issue to the GAL and she told me that I need reunification therapy and she gave me a list of reunification therapists in my area (WA). I spoke with a couple of them and they say that they can't stop my ex from alienating. They said they will be able to help me to have a relationship with my kids only by therapeutic support to me and my ex.
I want to follow GAL's recommendations, since she's supposed to be an advocate for the kids and I'm assuming she's recommending what's best for them. My lawyer says reunification therapy is expensive and I shouldn't try it, for now.
Has anyone had experience with something similar?
All suggestions and thoughts will be appreciated.
Thanks guys!
"Don't touch me!" While saying this he clinched his little fists and said it with conviction.
"I'm just going to play by myself." He said this at the beginning of a visit, as soon as he saw me.
"You're a bad man! I will kill you!"
While eating breakfast, in the beginning of a visit, he said to his mom: "I'm going to get to work, and we'll keep pressure."
"No need to touch me" You're bad" "You hurt my mommy!"
"You're not my dad, my grandpa is my dad."
"It's possible to only love mommy!" after I told him that I'm his dad.
I brought this issue to the GAL and she told me that I need reunification therapy and she gave me a list of reunification therapists in my area (WA). I spoke with a couple of them and they say that they can't stop my ex from alienating. They said they will be able to help me to have a relationship with my kids only by therapeutic support to me and my ex.
I want to follow GAL's recommendations, since she's supposed to be an advocate for the kids and I'm assuming she's recommending what's best for them. My lawyer says reunification therapy is expensive and I shouldn't try it, for now.
Has anyone had experience with something similar?
All suggestions and thoughts will be appreciated.
Thanks guys!
#37
Chit Chat / Re: SPARC Suggested Reading Li...
Last post by maybenut - Sep 19, 2020, 08:06:30 AMYeah, so I thought! My lawyer recently told me that the first case decided solely based upon PAS in my state (WA) was 2 months ago. If you are right, then I guess WA is behind on keeping themselves updated
#38
Chit Chat / Re: SPARC Suggested Reading Li...
Last post by Waylon - Sep 19, 2020, 07:24:02 AMPAS has been recognized for quite a while now. The material in the reading lists should still valid and useful, if a bit dated.
#39
Chit Chat / SPARC Suggested Reading List
Last post by maybenut - Sep 19, 2020, 07:22:37 AMAnyone know when the suggested reading list was last updated?
I'm dealing with PAS and need latest information. PAS is a relatively new issue that is more and more recognized in family courts. Looks like things are changing all the time in regards to this issue.
Thanks!
I'm dealing with PAS and need latest information. PAS is a relatively new issue that is more and more recognized in family courts. Looks like things are changing all the time in regards to this issue.
Thanks!
#40
Visitation Issues / Re: Help for father with MS
Last post by lupacexi - Sep 18, 2020, 02:25:46 AMThanks you for sharing