Father wins custody

[daddymccoy21]

That totally stinks! But I might have some good news for you regarding your current issue of your child staying at the hospital and helping at home.

Depending on the judge who hears your case, you have a good chance to file for an emergency hearing (ex parte). Call for an ex parte, explain your situation as you just did. There is the little known rule of "Right of First Refusal" that you can enact. Basically, what it means is that when your ex is going to be unavailable to care for the child, be it for vacation, work, sickness, date, etc. YOU have the right to be the caretaker during that time.

Most of the time, it has to be an 8 period of time that the parent is unavailable - then you have the right to custody during that time, even over grandparents, new spouses, siblings, babysitters, etc.

Try it out! There is a detailed section about this in Family Law Secret's Fathers Rights eBook (http://www.familylawsecrets.com) - that is how I know the ins and outs about what you should do.  I know about 3 dads who tried this when their ex's had to be at work, and they didnt, and it worked!

[JW]

That would be great, but I live over 4 hours away. But....
My attorney has called three times today and an emergency hearing has been filed, with a date to be heard either tuesday or wednesday next week. Some boards think I'm terrible for "taking" my daughter away from her mother. This is not the case at all. I just want what's best; we'll still have joint custody. SHE can make the trip to visit and pay child support if she chooses to continue a life as a single person, not a single parent, which is what she's been doing. I have offered to help multiple times, but kindness and sympathy only go so far. My daughter is at the hospital again today, waiting for her "mommy" to be discharged. I have contacted DHR to please go by the new address tomorrow and verify that my child is not enrolled in school and expected to stay home and "take care of" a grown woman. She is 9 - let her be a kid. Wish me luck next week, I'll probably need a little. I figure if the judge has agreed to even hear me, being out of state, that's a sign in my favor. Of course, this is for temporary physical custody, but I figure it's an uphill battle for her, too, at this point. Thanks for the support and encouragement.

[too_short]

I was in the same situation too and CP knew it.  So CP started denying visitations and brain washed daughter.  You'll be surprised how short of a time it takes to brain wash a child.  More furstrating was that while all of this was going on, my petitions were not getting heard.  By the time I was able to get court ordered counselling for daughter almost a year of this crap had already passed (extremely long story).  It was all too late then.

Yeah, ex got in trouble for denying visitations and preventing counseling for daughter, but she was able to retain custody because of it.  

[JW]

Apparently the judge was so concerned over my daughter yesterday morning after reading my info that he set a hearing for 4:00 TODAY!! My attorney called me at 3:00 yesterday, FAXed the affadavit, I FAXed it back this morning, and they served my ex at her home last night at 8:00. The first page was about Uniform Child Custody Act pursuant to Alabama Code 30-3-29, and the second page was Affadavit of ___________ in support of Motion for Orders Pendente Lite, whatever that means; all I know is what it SAID, and it was all good for me.

Now, of course, I'm a nervous wreck, at least until 4:00. I didn't have to be there, but if my ex doesn't show up, and knowing her like I do she'll think this is a bluff, even though I've warned her, I can go get my daughter tonight or in the morning.

I'm not overly religious, but I hope SOMEONE is praying for me, and for my daughter.

[jilly]

If she just got out of the hospital what are the odds of her showing up?!!

Good luck to you and your daughter today.

[JW]

Check out this link. My attorney found out what kind of surgery before doing this. Most go back to work within a week and go home the same day. Science is great. So many surgeries and easier now. I wanted to be somewhat compassionate, no matter how it sounds. She had it done at the new women's center in Huntsville.

http://www.webmd.com/hw/womens_conditions/tv7114.asp?pagenumber=4

[jilly]

I wouldn't count on that one week thing.  My oldest DD had her tubes tied. It was laproscopic surgery. It was outpatient surgery and the doctor told her she'd be able to go back to work in a few days after the surgery.  Well, once they actually did the surgery they had to make one more incision than they were planning on making.  DD ended up being out of work for about 2 - 3 weeks.  

[daddymccoy21]

Hey, I was really wondering how the emergency hearing went. Please let us know, as it is really interesting.

I cant see a reason why you wouldnt be given temp custody while your ex recovers from surgery. Especially given the fact that she was going to keep your child out of school to care for her.  What a bum.



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Fathers can have custody too
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[JW]

Thanks for your interest - it's been hectic. The hearing went well. My ex was required to keep daughter in school until Nov 23rd when a regular hearing/trial has been set for 9:00 AM. I was in Alabama on the 18th, also. The court wants all school records, child support records, moving records, the judge is asking for witnesses (which have been called), he also wants to talk to the child. My ex swore that she would "never" allow our daughter in court, so my attorney had my DAUGHTER served today, but with my ex having to sign because she's a minor. She's fit to be tied. She doesn't want my daughter talking to anyone. She has told people I'm behind on support (I have 24 months of cancelled checks), that I left AL because I was on crack (I have drug tests from employer starting 24 months ago), that I was going to send child to boarding school, just all kinds of crazy stuff. She's getting desperate and grasping at straws. Thanks for the good wishes - I'll keep you posted after the holidays. This could be info maybe some other father deserves to have. First of all, have your "ducks in a row." I have dates, times, checks, everything for the past 18-24 months, copies of receipts, witnesses, etc. Be prepared for anything and everything. Only advice I have so far.

[daddymccoy21]

Good to hear that you didnt totally get dismissed and ignored.

You know what, that is so sad that your ex is so unwilling to work with you that you had to serve your child with a summons. The most frustrating part is, that when the custodial "unfit" parent starts "getting desperate and grasping at straws", it usually works.

Good luck, and please keep us posted.

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Dads can have custody too
http://www.familylawsecrets.com
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