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forgiveness of back CS arrears without CP approval?

Started by beeboah, Oct 26, 2005, 05:34:12 AM

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Could I ask the judge to forgive back child support arrears if the CP "doesn't want that"?



to forgive back child support arrears?


before I disclose my reasoning (which might be reasonable), I would like to know if I need the CP's approval to proceed?


I was just researching retroactive CS for an issue that I am having (I am assuming you are in Florida from your reponse to my post). Judges have no authority to reverse arrears. If you genuinely had no ability to pay there may be a chance to avoid contempt, but the arrears are still yours unless CP agrees otherwise.

I hope that answers your question.

Good Luck


would be yes, you would need the CP's approval (but it's just a guess).

I am the CP and I would be furious if my ex asked the judge to forgive his back CS arrears without my approval.  The reason that I asked for your reason is because I'm sure that there ARE a few legitimate reason to ask for this.  If my ex had a REALLY good reason, I might consider it.

If you prefer not to disclose your reason, that's fine.  I just figured that your reason might make a difference to the judge and who knows your reason might be good enough for the CP to agree to it!


ok, to answer both of you I didn't want to disclose my reasoning because I have done that many a time on legal forums (not here) only to have my reasoning shot down before I could even get the facts....

has really put me on the defensive....

My new answer would tie into what ref said.

I have lost my job a few times and was unable to pay child support.

I didn't know how to ask for a modification and was highly deterred by the Department of Revenue when I asked.

I was also afraid that by the time I achieved the modification I would be making twice as much as the amount on which the initial child support was based...effectively doubling my payment by simply asking for a break.

I also fell into arrears between the time that our physical seperation transpired and when the judge actually issued the divorce (13 months)

I hate to say it, but even my lawyer didn't tell me that I needed to pay support during that time and that it would be back dated if I didn't.

Further to this, the ex lied to the DOR by saying that I never payed her money directly and for the purpose of child support.

(I did but just a few hundred bucks...still a lie on the ex's behalf")

My reasoning to the judge:

1) several job losses
2) I am presently paying
3) Revoked US passport due to arrears (could create visitation interference if I take the wrong airline)
4) Marks on credit report (inhibit my overall financial ability and effectively ability to pay)


AND have you been paying the full amount.

Sorry, but only one of your reasons seems valid to me.  Please don't take offense, but since I don't know you personally, I have to go with my gut instinct.

My ex would tell the judge all of those same things to get the arrears wiped out, except for the "I am presently paying" because he is not paying and never really has (in 14 years).   The few (and I truly mean few) times that my ex "could" tell the judge that he has been paying, it would only be in the amount of $10/week (his CS payment is $68/week).  He has NEVER paid the full amount!

Sorry, but I don't think that you have a case.  Is the arrears amount huge????  Maybe you could get a part-time job to help pay it off.
I know that it's not easy.  When my daughter was a baby, I worked 3 jobs just to keep up with my bills.  You do what you have to do!


May I ask you what "instinct" has to do with anything?

That is the problem with getting advice sometimes. It seems that everyone has to judge others with emotions related to their own personal problems.

It is a crime to sign a document and tell a governmental body that you have not received funds directly when you have.

My reasons may not be the "best" in your eyes or perhaps anyone elses, but if permissable I am sure that this would open the judges' eyes wide.

As Ref said, I don't have a case but not due to the validity or invalidity of my reasons.

That is why I usually refrain from talking about my reasoning for proceeding with legal matters.

What your ex would do has absolutely nothing to do with me or my situation.

I have payed for most of the 4 years that this rediculous order has been popped against me. I have payed the full amount during this time period.

Rediculous in that I have to pay someone else to take my child away from me.

I am not going to get a part time job so that my child support will increase when the money hungry ex wants to get her nails done and go out to eat with. (This is what she tells me she does with the money BTW)

Maybe I could "CON" the CP into forgiving my arrears? She had no problem "CONNING" the judge into believing that I was a bad person and getting an Ex Parte Motion against me without my presence.

Yet, no mention was ever made of her chronic life-threatening STD or her domestic violence record to the court.

Question has been answered, I am not going to waste any more time on this thread.


By "gut instinct", I meant "in my opinion".  I don't know you personally, so my answer was based on your reasons.  The only one that I thought (again, just my opinion) was reasonable was that you are paying!

I know what you mean about working a part-time job.  I didn't like doing it either.  And because they took all THREE incomes into account when deciding what the CS would be, my ex's CS was lowered significantly.  But, I worked three jobs to keep my bills paid and to keep a roof over our heads.  

I KNOW that there are many NCPs out there who are honestly trying to do their best to support their children in every way.  You sound like you are probably one of those NCPs, but I am just trying to be honest with you.  I really don't think that the judge is going to forgive the arrears based on your reasons.  I don't think that it's right that your ex gets her nails done and goes out to eat if she keeps telling you that she needs the child support increased.  I can assure that I am not that kind of CP.  My daughter definitely comes first.  Alot of my clothes are hand-me-downs from my sister and when I HAVE to buy something for myself, it is usually from Walmart or Kmart.  I have had my nails done a total of TWO times in my lifetime and both times were for a family wedding (a family member paid for it).  I know many CPs like your ex and it's not right.  I hope that you can resolve this problem.

Sorry if my advice upset you.  That was not my intention.


read all the *rules* of his posts though otherwise, he won't answer you. He is very smart

I don't think you have a chance in any family court of a judge just erasing arrearages. Hell, we had / have a 10K error in the CP's favor and will never get it straightened out and now she has gotten a large amount of money due to our refinancing of our house.

It's all pretty sucky but, it's reality