The storm...knew it was coming

[catherine]

Kitten, I have been on SPARC MUCH longer than you ever dreamt about.  I am now a custodial stepmom to 2 boys and have a bio son with DH.  I was a non-custodial stepmother for 2 years.  I first "found" the boards 4 years ago when BM wanted to move away with the kids.  Been there, done that -  from false CPS calls, denied visitation, denied phone contact, drama at pickup/dropoffs, the whole deal, hence why I have a real soft spot for father's rights.

You aren't the only one who has gone through this stuff and have dealt with someone like Will's ex.  How long have you been in this situation?  You are overreacting to some stuff.  I know your pain.  You need to let the little things go.  Like the note she wanted you to sign.  There were other options and you need to figure them out and work them (with or without your attorney's approval).

Look, she is playing games.  You have to learn to play it back or you WILL be paying for your LAWYER's kids' college.

I had this already posted but the way I do the math, IF she moves and Will gets 8 weeks of summer and holidays, he will actually get MORE TIME with the kids.  Instead of concentrating on fighting this move, you better have a back-up plan for the visitation you want should it go her way in court.

And never tell me I have no idea what I am commenting on.  I am commenting from experience.  Seems like all you want is people to feel sorry for you.  I don't.  You are going into this with your eyes wide open.

And yes, I am bothered by your and Will's affair.  Going to counselling isn't going to make that go away.  And yes, I am bothered that you made a post worried that your ex is showing more interest because he has a new gf, meanwhile you are totally emeshed in your fiance's custody case.  Pot meet kettle.

[catherine]

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[kitten]

You are obviously judging us, you didn't have to tell me that.  I don't want anyone to feel sorry for ME.  But it would be nice if people could feel sorry for the kids.  Let me just make one last comment to you, Your "advice" sucks and I don't need YOUR help.  You are such a bitter, judgmental witch.  Your DH's life must be hell.  

Don't go away mad, just go away.

[MYSONSDAD]

Custody Board # 3113

"Children learn what they live"

[catherine]

nm

[Genie]

I guess you don't want to hear anything unless we are 100% agreeing with you, huh?

You are not the only one going through stuff like this.  My DH has been doing this for the 12 years and you have no idea what he has gone through and endured through that time. It would make your head roll just hearing the long story about my DH's ex.  She has done everything in her power to keep DH out of their lives or least so they don't actually think of them as Dad.  We have been through basically everything you can get thrown at you.

I was just pointing out that she doesn't have to be accomodating and switch around vistation whenever he asks.  And guess what, the courts don't think she will need to either. Vistitation is a set schedule. They view that as stability in for the children. Changing the schedule makes thing harder. Since you commented on how uncooperative she has been with the scheduling, it seems that this type of thing happens more than often.  

Has your BF thought about what type of visitation schedule if she is given permission to move? Hopefully he will be asking for all breaks and all or most of Summer and that she either pay all of or a good portion of travel costs.

Oh, and my DH's ex put the children in the middle of every little thing happening.  The divorce states they are supposed to foster good will to each other for the children and believe me, she never did that at all.  I can you tell you it was never considered abuse when brought up in court. The most she ever got was told not to do it but that was it and she kept going on her marry way telling the kids everything.  In fact, I don't think I know of anyone whose BM has ever been admonished and gotten on trouble except dearsirena on SW's board and that is b/c her PB is on another planet in itself when it comes to these things.  Just letting you know this b/c it will probably just get worse if she is allowed to move. PAS is very hard to prove and isn't even really acknowledged in a lot of states.

[wendl]

Report Kitten to admin, I highly doubt Waylon is gonna do anything with your petty fights, come on now, if you don't like Kitten don't respond, Kitten if you don't like her don't respond.

Much bigger issues around than who thinks what of whom on this site.

:)
**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[catherine]

that a lousy CP makes a lousy NCP.  PB is still a problem even though my DH has primary custody. The things I've learned the most from SW's is that 1) you need to pick your battles and not let every little thing drive you nuts and 2) you need to find a way to deal with PB in some shape or form, because she won't go away and 3) no one walks away from family court happy.

[catherine]

But maybe some people need reminding that it's not OK to name call and throw pointless insults out there.

[LAK]

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